This morning I woke up after what could only be explained as a sad dream. I dreamt of all the past Thanksgivings and how my family used to be. A lot has changed over the past 5 or so years and my head is still trying grasp everything that has happened. First we lost my Grandpa. This was probably the most significant change. Grandpa was the head of our family. When he died, small cracks began to form in how our family dynamic worked. No longer were there big family dinners. Or should I say happy ones. All the big get-togethers were filled with happy, but painful memories. Then I got married, and moved away. This wasn't a sad occasion, but it changed things. Then my Dad started having serious problems with mobility and needed several surgeries. My parents no longer could go many places. My bother got a DUI, and it just added to the tension. The cracks were becoming wider, no matter how much I tried to keep it together. My family is close, and we still are, but things are different. Life has changed us all, and I'm not sure how I feel about it. I hate being away from them. I hate that I am not there. Two weekends ago, we celebrated Thanksgiving, (which I already wrote about) and it was great, but things were different. Grandpa wasn't there to start the blessing. I keep telling myself that this is life. He is where he is supposed to be. This is not our home, but only a place we are to live until God is ready for us, and God was ready for Grandpa. I was just not ready to let him go.
Now that I have depressed myself, I guess all these ramblings have a point: Be Thankful. Be Thankful for what you have, you never know when things will change. I am so Very Thankful for my husband, my puppy, my family, and my friends. Things do change, but that just means you have to change also.
Now for the things I am thankful for:
My Family
My Friends
EW's Family
My Brother
My Husband & Puppy
-Brina
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